So, at the turn of the New Year I wrote that I was going to recommit to this blog, to thinking positively and enjoying life, and that I was going to be disciplined with it, just like going on a diet. So, how is the diet going?
This week the discipline has come in the form of setting myself schedules for the day, including a schedule for when I will NOT do work (for about an hour after I get home), not listening to the voice that says “set snooze on the alarm” in the morning, concentrating on quieting any self-criticism, and making sure that every day I do something for myself that brings me towards my goal of being truly happy. So far this has included things like ordering books about things I’d like to learn about, or calling a friend, doing a short meditation CD, or making plans of new things to do.
In the last post I mentioned the idea of a self-criticism swear box, £1 for each negative thought, and the next day I was really shocked by the huge debt I racked up! It had reached at least a fiver before I’d even left the house for work and for things I realised were really stupid, like looking in the mirror and saying “your hips are so wide”, “your chin is a bit fat”, also thinking sarcastically about the day ahead. By the end of the day I’d lost count, and thought it must have got to about £50. From then on I decided I needed to make a conscious effort to shut that critical voice up, and also to laugh at the silly things it was telling me. I never even realised I was bothered about having a chubby chin until I was listening to that voice so closely! It’s kind of funny the things it comes up with. The moral of the story is, watch your thoughts, and don’t believe everything you think!
Anyway, the result of this week’s diet is that I am feeling much happier, much more in control, satisfied with how everything is going, organised and calmer. Keeping this up is now more important than ever, as I begin a week at work where I will be under pressure to perform well in an observation, and attend a progress meeting with the senior management. Wish me luck! 🙂